Threat level: Midnight — can you chance skipping ‘Office’-themed bar crawl for charity in Tremont?

The press release starts out this way:

“Bears. Beets. Bar Crawl.”

Yes, fans of the former NBC hit comedy series “The Office,” as you wait breathlessly for a reboot of the series to be greenlit, you can spend a few hours toasting the series — and helping a local cause, the Cleveland Chapter of A Special Wish Foundation — in Cleveland’s Tremont area.

Oh, it’s on like a prawn who yawns at dawn!

The Office”-inspired Charity Bar Crawl will take place from noon to 5 p.m. March 9 at Barrio, Treehouse, Crust, Coda, Hi and Dry and The South Side, with additional locations to be announced, according to the release.

Man, I don’t know if I could fit that all in.

That’s what she said!

Each participating bar will feature themed drink specials and décor.

Good thing March 9 is a Saturday. (For my New Year’s resolution, I gave up drinking … during the week.)

The event promises more than booze, by the way:

Crawlers will participate in a scavenger hunt that would make Michael Scarn proud. Those that successfully complete the scavenger hunt will receive a “World’s Best Boss” special edition mug.

Participants are asked to sign up under the following team names: Team Michael, Team Halpert, Team Dwight, Team Meredith, Team Creed, Team Kelly, Team Stanley, and Team Phyllis. Crawlers are encouraged to come dressed as their favorite character from the show.

“This bar crawl provides us with a fun and innovative way to engage with our community while raising funds for Northeast Ohio wish kiddos who have life threatening diseases. We are honored that the businesses in the Tremont community are contributing to granting wishes for local kiddos.”

says Eileen Lane, executive director of A Special Wish Foundation Cleveland Chapter, in the release.

Tickets are $25 and available now online with all the proceeds going to the charity, according to the release. Participants will receive a commemorative sweatshirt and a crawl passport for route maps and exclusive drink specials.

Don’t be late, because you know what they say: Early worm gets the worm.

But do watch out for the Tremont strangler.

If you’re on the fence about going, do what I do: Whenever I’m about to do something, I ask myself, “Would an idiot to that? And if they would, I do not do that thing.”

Like Michael Scott, Mark Meszoros sometimes starts a sentence and doesn’t know where it’s going, hoping he will find it along the way. Follow him on Twitter @MarkMeszoros. Image credit: Metro Creative Connection.

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